7 Ways To Boost Your Self Confidence

Self Confidence is Self-Care

How confident do you feel right now? Everyone has a different answer depending on their present situation, time of the day, or maybe after a cup of coffee. It’s not always easy to consistently feel confidence in yourself, especially when faced with the stresses that life inevitably throws your way. I’ve written out seven different ways that you can give yourself the little confidence kick you need for when that happens. After all, investing in your confidence is investing in your self-care.

Confidence isn’t Arrogance

Do you ever feel like you’re not enough, or that you’re too much? What about when you’re around co-workers or friends, and you can’t shake the feeling like you can’t be yourself. Your feelings are real, but they are not reality. All too often, everyone’s perception of others around them is based on your own feelings, which can be exacerbated by peers who may be feeling similarly.

When you’re focused on your personal growth and success, you aren’t paying attention to what other people think about you. Sometimes it can feel like you’re being too ambitious or arrogant. Confidence isn’t arrogance. Believing in yourself is not vanity – it’s self-empowerment. The most confident women that I have ever known, KNEW that they were amazing. They were not afraid to admit it, because they knew that anyone that they wanted to be around would also recognize their awesomeness.

Practice

No one is born confident. Just like everything else that you have mastered, confidence is a learned habit. It is something that you can practice and become better at. Fake it til you make it. Imagine yourself as a character that is confident, and act like you already have it (because you do). Deep inside of you, you know that you are an amazing, badass, woman, and you can start acting like it at any moment. Depression, anxiety, and PTSD will add a layer of difficulty, but practicing as a part of your daily routine can help reinforce treatment and therapy.

Practice Humility

Confidence is sexy when you are kind and loving. Make sure that your confidence is coming from a loving, sincere place. Always remember what it is like to be the self-conscious girl. Practice compassion. You have no idea what kind of trauma someone else has experienced. You DO NOT need to unscrew other girls light’s to make yours shine brighter. Combine your light with everyone around you and be authentic so that other ladies feel comfortable to shine brighter with you. We all win this way.

Know Your Tribe

Since the beginning of time, humans have had tribes. Without a community, we become depressed, have low self-confidence, don’t feel a sense of belonging, or know our purpose.

There are individuals that have yet to experience their spiritual awakening and don’t realize that we are all one. And then there are your people, that share the same dreams and values as you. Maybe you aren’t quite vibrating at the same frequency that they are, but with some life coaching and spiritual mentorship, you can learn how to raise your vibration and become the best version of yourself to attract the best crew for you.

Make Health A Priority

Have you ever left the gym NOT feeling more confident? If you don’t like the gym, I suggest looking for an alternative resolution. Get moving. You can rock climb, hike, rollerblade, practice yoga, join a spin class, etc. The list goes on. Health is not only about what you look like. It affects your mood, sleep pattern, and YOUR LOW CONFIDENCE. Eating a healthy diet and getting proper rest and exercise will help your confidence significantly. Set some weekly health goals for yourself. 20-minutes of exercise 3x per week is much better than none at all.

Practice Meditation

When was the last time you took some time for yourself? Daily meditation practice is a great way to slow down, and allow your mind, body, and spirit to align. When you take a holistic approach, you are opening communication with the universe. Profound insights arise when you retreat to silence. When you return to your natural state, you begin to realize the things that are truly important.

Invest Time and Love in Yourself

There are many ways that you can invest in yourself. Facebook and meetup are places where you can find local and online workshops. Educating yourself is a great way to build confidence. A life coach can help you to find your blind spots and understand where your lack of confidence is stemming from. You don’t know what you don’t know.

There is so much that you can learn from having someone asking you questions that you might not think to ask yourself. A coach will help you learn and grow. Do you know what happens when you learn and grow? You begin to feel more confident in yourself! Find a coach that offers services that resonate with you. If you want to feel more confident, find a confidence coach.

If you want to heal your heart, release stuck energy from trauma, and passionately fall in love with your life, check out my online coaching program –The Goddess Heart Healing Circle.

If you made it this far, please help a sister out by sharing this blog with your friends to elevate their vibrations as well! Everyone deserves free content!

Finding and Maintaining Flow

Were you “in the flow” and now you are trying to find your way back? Or maybe you have never been in the flow and you’re ready to find out what that even means? Are you wondering if it is even possible for someone as angry as you to reach a state of complete bliss? The answer is yes. You can reach equanimity.

There are always going to be new situations arising in your life. You cannot control the happenings in the world around you. So, how do you stay in the flow with new things constantly arising?

Think back to the last time you felt like you were in “the flow”. If you don’t know what this feeling is, or have never experienced this feeling, keep reading. Maybe something in this blog will inspire you to have this experience. I would explain this as my feeling of One with the Universe. It’s the complete acceptance of everything that happens. Free of resistance, anger, fear, and confusion. Everything feels like it is aligned perfectly.

Do a life scan

If you can, find a quiet, calm place with a neutral temperature to do this. Sit in a comfortable position, close your eyes, and imagine what your life would be like if it were PERFECT. Have you ever imagined this?

What would you do with your time?
What career would you have?
Who would you be friends with?
How much money would you be making?
What kinds of things would you and your friends do?
What would your perfect Saturday evening look like?
As a result, you can begin to get a clear image of who it is that you are working towards becoming. Furthermore, you can start becoming that ideal image.

What should I keep in my life?

Think about what habits you want to posses when you are at your peak point of success?

Write a list of things/habits you currently have. Which of those habits would you like to keep?

Think about the people that have everything in life that you want. In contrast, what characteristics and qualities do they possess?

What habits should I get rid of?

We all have that one thing. Consequently, It’s like our spirit is screaming at us to stop doing it, but we can’t. Whatever unhealthy thing that you are passionate about- let it go.

You thought it for the reason that you know it is bad for you. Write it down. Set the intention to allow yourself to let go of the attachment, and then let it be.

Don’t repeatedly kick your own ass because you continue to indulge. Enjoy it if you are going to make the decision to do it. Above all, you show me that you are ready to let it go because you are reading this blog.

Make a list of the things that you do daily that you do not want to do any longer.

I know first hand how hard it is to quit things that you are addicted to (including drugs, alcohol, and anger). Just by writing these things down, you are planting a seed. You are setting the intention on who you are becoming. Therefore, you have taken control.

Trust the process

A rock in a riverbed is stuck in the same place, resisting the flow. The water is calm and persistent. It continues to flow around anything that is in its path. The rock is heavy and does not move with the current. As a result, the rock slowly begins to diminish. The body of water takes away from the rock.

If you are in the water (flow, universe, alignment) allow yourself to flow freely. If there is resistance, like the rock- you will begin to diminish. You must have trust in the universe and in yourself.

Don’t burn yourself out

Always remember that 6 months ago, you dreamed of being where you are now. Just keep pushing, keep grinding. You’ll get there. Don’t ever forget that the most important thing is the ride.

A great way to avoid getting burned out is to keep a journal where you list the things you are proud that you accomplished every day, and a list of at least three things that you are grateful for.

If you don’t think you have anything to be grateful for, try doing your morning routine with your eyes closed.

Take action

You don’t get to sit on your bum and watch the universe start working miracles for you. You know that you have to identify things you love about your life, get rid of the things you do not love, and remain grateful.

You have to stop complaining about the past and start taking steps towards a better you. The only person you need to be better than is the person you were yesterday.

As an ascension coach, I can help you identify where resistance is occurring in your life, how to get rid of it, and be in complete alignment with the universe. Time is the only limit.

Schedule a free consultation with me today.

How to Manage Anxiety | Part 1

Identify triggers

It is not uncommon for anxiety attacks to arise when you are in a relaxed state. Take note of things that you notice around the time of your anxiety. The more that you understand about your anxiety, the easier it will be for you to start gaining control. A few questions that you can ask yourself to better understand where your anxiety is stemming from;

Are you aware of what is causing your attacks?
Where you are experiencing resistance in your life?
Are you neglecting any personal needs?
Are the attacks occurring at a certain time of the day?
Is there something that consistently gives you anxiety?
What was happening right before you started to feel the attack arising?

Move around

When you are moving, you are growing. Moving and showing your body love feels good. There is also a newly gained confidence and a feeling of accomplishment when you get your blood flowing. If you are regularly moving your body you will also experience results like better sleep, more energy, mental clarity, and many other physical benefits.

You don’t necessarily have to go to the gym to get the blood flowing. There are millions of videos and workouts posted online that you can accomplish in the comfort of your own home. Make sure that your goal is realistic for you. 20 minutes of exercise, 3x per week might be a great start for a healthy individual who does not have a regular exercise routine. If you’re not feeling the gym, throw on your favorite jams, and have a dance party at your house! Dancing is so liberating and fun. It doesn’t matter how you move, just move! Shake your shoulders and wiggle around! Do what feels natural and makes your body feel good. By moving around, you are breaking up any energy blocks or tension that could be stuck in your body.

Creative expression

Humans enjoy creating differently. If you aren’t sure of what you enjoy creating, it is time to begin exploring your options. There is something out there for you, and if you are struggling to find a creative outlet- you can make something up! Some individuals enjoy creating jewelry, pottery, paintings, stories, and even things like taxidermy!

Letting out a little creativity can do a world of good for your psyche. There are different phases that your body must go through to maintain balance, and one of them is allowing yourself to create something. Maybe you splatter paint all over a canvas, or something a little more structured like writing a short story about something that you love. It is okay if these things don’t feel as if they come naturally to you. If you are trying something new, it generally won’t feel natural. Try to focus on enjoying the task more than being good at it. If you enjoy whatever you are creating, you will naturally become more skillful. Skillset is a result, not a requirement.

Positive affirmations

Which do you think comes first- Success or Positive Self-Talk? Imagine a life where you focus on nothing but the positive things that you have accomplished. The universe pays attention to the things that you focus on and delivers more of that to you because you are activating something called the Law Of Attraction.

“I am constantly growing and evolving into the woman that I desire to be. I am a woman of value and integrity. I build healthy, valuable relationships. I set boundaries with people I love because I respect myself”. –Whitney Sause

Having a hard time coming up with some positive affirmations? Check out my weekly wisdom/affirmation give-aways, where I will send you weekly positive affirmations and nuggets of wisdom to stimulate you and your new positive mindset.

Practice Yoga

Yoga is the perfect way to center your mind, body, and spirit. Yoga is also great for calming your nerves, and genuinely nurturing your body. There are many different kinds of yoga classes available, so take the time to find one that is best for you.

If you live in the Kansas City area, I recommend Karma Tribe Yoga in Westport or InBliss Yoga in NKC. Look up the different types of classes and see which one best fits your personal goals and needs. Don’t give up!

Write Freely

I like to refer to this as an “information download”. I prefer to use the old-fashioned pen and paper method because the style of your handwriting adds an extra element of creativity that a computer will not display. Set aside a certain amount of time to write freely without worrying about spelling, grammar, or topic. Let your hand write whatever it wants to.

Turn off all distractions, find a pen that you enjoy using, get in a comfortable position, and start writing. You might come up with solutions or answers that you weren’t even aware you were seeking.

Recap & What to look forward to in part 2

In part 1 of How to Manage Anxiety, I covered identifying triggers, moving around to break up stuck energy or tension in your body, having a creative outlet to maintain balance, using positive affirmations to add life to things that are going well and attracting more positive experiences, practicing yoga to center your mind, body, and spirit, and lastly, Freewriting as a way to reflect.

Next week, in part two, I will release 7 more techniques to reduce and possibly eliminate anxiety from your life.

Creating new habits and sticking to them can be a challenge, but seeing them multiple times can really help them stick with you. It might be beneficial to write these 6 steps down in order to further your familiarization with them.

If you are experiencing extreme anxiety, please seek professional help immediately. It is important to take care of yourself and get to the root issue so that you can live the best life available to you. I am currently assisting women in their transformation and would love to connect to see if I am the right coach for you.

If one or all of these have helped you in some way, please feel free to share your growth experiences so that we can reach other women and inspire them to start making these positive changes as well.

15 ways to attract your perfect mate

Get over the partner that ISN’T the person of your dreams.

Are you still in a relationship with a person that you know is wrong for you? Maybe you have already left and still can’t stop thinking about them? There is a man out there that is PERFECT for you, however, do you think that he will want to be with you if you are sad and hung up on someone that doesn’t make you happy? What does that say about the way that you treat yourself?

Whether you are still with them or have already ended things and still just can’t seem to get them off of your mind, you can start by asking yourself these questions;

What qualities do I love about this person?
Am I my ideal self when I am with this person?
If I knew everything about this person that I know now, would I still choose to have these feelings for them?
In one of my coaching sessions (where I was the Coachee) I realized that it is a common goal amongst couples to stay together ’til death. They want to stay together, through thick n’ thin, because they have been conditioned to believe that if you don’t “stick it out” then you have failed. You can love someone greatly and still not want to be with them any longer. That is perfectly normal! There is no sense in kicking your own ass for moving forward with your life and having the best experience available to you. That is not selfish, that is self-care.

Decide how you want your IDEAL partner to treat you.

Take this to the pillow! Allow yourself to sit and meditate on what your ideal mate is like. Get as specific as you can! The more specific you are when you ask for something, the more likely you will be to get the result that you want! This is because the universe listens to the things that you are focused on, and delivers more of it to you! Forget all of the things that you have experienced in relationships in your past. What do you want NOW?

Start treating yourself the way that you want to be treated.

How can you expect to attract your ideal mate if you aren’t treating yourself the way that you want to be treated? Are you being kind to yourself, treating yourself like a queen, and only speaking positively to yourself? What does your self-talk sound like? Start treating yourself the way that you would want the man/women of your dreams to treat you. Run yourself a bath, take sexy pictures of yourself, massage your own feet, and leave yourself cute notes! I love to send myself gifts with messages in them like “You are doing amazing! Keep up all of your hard work! I love you!” You deserve absolute happiness and you can achieve that if you start filling your own cup and stop looking for someone else to make you whole. You are already whole.

Know that you deserve love

When you begin to fall in love with yourself, you will feel this sense of happiness, confidence, and contentment. When you start treating yourself the way that you expect your significant other to, you will appeal to someone that sees that as an attractive quality. If you are constantly telling yourself that you are not good enough, people will sense that. If there is resistance, you could potentially miss out on making a true connection with the person that you desire.

You will reach a point where you are so happy with yourself and the way that you are treating yourself, that you will feel as if you don’t NEED a man/women, and THAT is when- out of nowhere- the most amazing person you could ever think up will be right next to you wondering where you have been all of his/her life.

Don’t settle

I often encounter clients that are fearful of being lonely, so they settle for something they are not happy with. The conditioning that we have had since we were children has been to find a man, marry him, and stay with him until you die, no matter what or you have failed. I have news for you; It’s 2019. You are not a failure if things do not work out. It takes great strength to exit a relationship out of love for yourself and the other person. If the relationship does not make you feel good, then why are you in it? Are you upset more often than you are happy? The only purpose of this existence is to observe and enjoy. You don’t have time to waste on people that do not contribute to your happiness and success.

Invest your time wisely

Don’t spend all of your time looking for a significant other to come and “complete you”. The law of attraction plays a part in this, because what the universe senses that you are focusing on- it delivers more of. Focus on activities that will make you a better version of yourself so that you will be appealing to the person that you are interested in being with. Neediness is not attractive. Expressing your needs and wants in a relationship is not what I am referring to when I say neediness. Set your intention and let the seed grow while you are working hard on yourself.

Meditate on it

It’s likely I won’t post a blog that doesn’t mention meditation at least one time. This is because meditation is so powerful! Sit on your pillow, close your eyes, and begin to imagine your ideal mate is there with you. How do they look, smell, feel, and make you feel? What are the qualities you love most about them? Get a very precise image of this person in your mind, because the more specific you are in what you are asking for, the more specific the universe will be when delivering. Don’t become attached to the image of the mate you are envisioning, this is simply a guideline to getting closer to knowing what you want.

Set your intention

Take the time to set the intention that you are going to find this ideal mate, and approximately when it will happen. Do not become attached to this idea, as that will cause suffering. Just imagine them, write about them, mention them to a friend, and wait. No need to stress or worry. Focus your attention on evolving into a better woman than you were yesterday so that when they find you- they are able to experience your truest self.

Ditch your shitty break-up story

It is understandable that you spent a lot of time with your ex and that is all you felt like you knew, but if you can’t stop talking about them and all the stupid stuff you did in your past- it is likely that the perfect mate isn’t going to be interested. No one cares about your baggage. You are the only on that is in control of your happiness, and focusing your attention on the past is not the way to grow and evolve. When you are focused on the past you are giving your mind a reason to be anxious. Talk about your future plans and dreams, something new that you tried recently, or a place that you would like to try.

Make love to yourself

Another one that I feel should be mentioned in all of my blogs- Masturbate! This topic has so much stigma or secrecy around it. I had friends most of my life that I did not feel comfortable talking about my sexual experiences with. This was difficult for me being an open and passionate person. There have been times where I was literally thinking “I am going to be single and lonely forever, and no one will ever meet my needs”. “Whoa is me”, right? Then, I make the loving decision to please myself and everything is fine! I go from feeling like the world is on top of me, to feeling like I am on top of the world. I am blessed to have friends that I can discuss these things with, and if you do not- I highly recommend acquiring at least one.

Imagine you already have him/her

You can choose to live your life upset and sad because you are lonely waiting for someone to come save you, or you can pick yourself up, and take care of your own life. You are fully capable of doing everything that you want to do with your partner, without them. If you want to go to the movies, go to the dang movies! If you are unhappy with the way that things are going without a significant other, how do you know that you will be happy WITH them? You must flip the switch of acceptance and go with the flow. Live your life the same way that you would if you had someone in your life that you love. Eventually, they will organically fall into the position.

Speak them into existence

Tell your close friends and loved ones what it is that you are looking for. Talk about them as if you know for a fact that they are real and they are PERFECT for you. If you have doubt in your mind about the fact that the perfect mate exists, the universe will question if you are even ready for something like that. You must stop resisting the natural flow. If you can dream them, they can become a reality. Talk about how things will be when you find them.

Choose your friends wisely

Pay attention to what your friends are saying. Words are more than just words. Words are vibrations that create feelings. If your friends are putting you down, or not positively affirming the desires that you have, why are they your friends? There are people that have the same morals and values as you, and they will reassure you that everything you want is possible, because IT IS! Same as finding a mate, you don’t want to settle. You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. Do you want to be like them?

Travel

Before traveling solo I had no idea who I truly was. In my travels, I met so many incredible people and had so many prodigious experiences that changed my journey forever. If you are in the same town doing the same thing on repeat, you are limiting your life experience. Exposing yourself to new activities will open doors for you to realize what you are passionate about it. When you are in flow with the universe and not resisting, you meet a vast amount of people that seem to be placed there just for you. It may seem like the universe or god put them in your way for a reason. In your travels, pay close attention to who you meet and what their mission is. You don’t ever meet anyone by chance.

Invest in yourself

When you resist the natural flow of things, you cause yourself more suffering. You are being called to do something better for yourself, or you wouldn’t be reading this blog. It is time to start making moves. When you start going with the flow you will begin to make progress. If you are looking to level-up, you must begin attending the local events that are related to the growth that you are looking to experience. There are meetup groups, Bumble Bizz, and many FaceBook groups where you can find workshops, seminars, and Life Coaches. You’ve already started taking steps in the right direction by reading this, why not set up a free consultation to see if a coach is right for you?

I am already impacting the lives of many women. I am accessible to you now. Are you ready to start making life-changing moves? Let’s get to work! Email me now to schedule a time to discuss where we will begin your journey of transformation.

As always, if this blog impacts your journey in some way, please don’t hesitate to share! Sharing your story may help someone else to better understand their experience. Let’s make kindness cool!

Manifesting A Life Of Greatness

Have you ever asked someone how things were going and received something that seemed like an auto response? Maybe something like “fine”, “Okay”, or “same shit different day”?

Do you recall ever saying something like that?

My friend Jose works in retail. Today, he mentioned to me that he asks hundreds of people how their day is going, and not a single one of them responded with something positive.

You have control of your own future and happiness.

Life is 10% what happens to you, and 90% how you react to it. There is no “pursuit of happiness”. Happiness is a choice that we can all make. It is something that is already in our beings, and all you must do is decide that you want to be happy. (I am not implying that you should be happy all the time. Feeling emotion is healthy. I will delve more into that later!)

You become what you manifest

Fortunately, in this life, we were granted with free will. That means that you have the ability to decide what you want to focus your energy on. Have you ever noticed that happy people seem to always get what they want? Maybe there is someone in your life that good things are constantly happening to. This is because they are manifesting positive energy through focusing on the things that are going well for them, rather than the things that are not going well for them. It is also likely that they are able to look at failures as something that brings them closer to success. Failure is the creation of growth. We weren’t born walking. We failed and failed until we finally nailed it. We never gave up. Don’t give up on your positive mindset and power of manifestation.

You have the power to change your life.

You can do it RIGHT NOW. You can decide RIGHT NOW that you want to start changing the way you think. You can rewire your brain to start believing in the person that you WANT to be. It would be way easier to stick to my old habits and routines, but I know that if I do that I will not ever become the woman of value that I aspire to be.

You can literally be anything you want. If your brain is capable of dreaming something, it means that is available to you.

Has there been a time where you were thinking about something that happened in the past, and your body started feeling the same way (if not worse) than when it happened? You could literally feel your temperature rising and your heart beating faster?

Our minds react to thoughts that we have. Thoughts creating feelings. If you can become angry thinking about something negative that occurred, why wouldn’t you be able to become happy from a pleasant thought? The thought doesn’t even have to be real. You can use your imagination to create an illusion in your brain that can stimulate you to the point where the things you are imagining start to become your reality.

THAT is what growth is. Imagining something that makes you happy and starts moving towards it.

Don’t settle for your past.

Start focusing on the things that are going great in your life. Use your imagination to create a place that makes you feel great. Manifest positivity. DECIDE that you want to have a great day, and then DO IT.

An exercise that I find helpful is to close my eyes and imagine where I want to be in 20 years. Who is she? How does she react to things? Where does she live? What is she doing?

I think about it so in depth that it feels like I am really there. I carry this thought with me throughout my day, and I know that I am getting closer and closer to becoming her.

You are in control of every step that you take, and with everything that you experience, you have the choice to decide how it makes you feel. You can experience them in a way that is enjoyable, or you can choose to suffer.

I am sure you have heard the phrase “stop and smell the roses”. Have you ever tried that? Just going outside and counting things that you have to be grateful for? Try thinking about how awesome it is that you have a body that FEELS the heat on your skin. A body that allows you to sweat out what it needs to and keeps you cool.

Don’t worry about the judgments that come up in your mind. Do not worry about what other people are doing, what they have, or how they got it. Focus on yourself. How did I get here? What is it that I am supposed to be doing here? How am I going to get where I want to be?

Don’t focus on “why this is happening to me”, rather- “what am I going to learn from this experience?”

When we are moving- we are growing, and we are evolving.

Everything you do is an opportunity to learn if you take advantage of it. Stimulate your mind with things that make you feel good, and let go of the thoughts from your past that are not helping you become the person that you want to be. You become what you manifest. Be aware of the thoughts you are having throughout your day, and if they are helping you become the person that you desire to be.

Have a great weekend, my friends. Namaste.